This is it you guys, this is where my chapter ends.

2015



 I honestly do not know what to feel or how to act.
I haven't been home for a week yet, but I still have no clue what I am doing half
of the time. Being a foreign exchange student is so hard, there are so many positive and
negative things with going, and there is nothing in this world I would trade for the year I spent abroad.
All the great people I met, everything I experienced, everything I have seen, is a undescribable
memorylane. I cannot express my graditude or my thankfulness to my parents for giving me this
amazing opportunity. They have been so supportive, loving and caring throughout my year 
and I wouldn't have survived without them by my side.
Even though they were thousands of miles away, they still help me through my hard times,
still stucked with me, and I am forever grateful for that.
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I have never been more scared, excited and fearful at the same time.
I have never cried, laughed and felt so many feelings as I did that day.
I have never been more happy in my enitre life.
I have never looked at my life the same since I boarded that plane on August 9th.
Ever since I stepped my right foot on my first flight to London, nothing has ever
been the same again.
I remember not feeling anything but happiness that day, and how could I feel anything else?
I was about to start the next chapter of my life, my next great adventure, all by myself.
How could a 15 year old girl who is traveling to America be anything but happy?
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I remember the feeling of taking my last footstep on swedish grounds for 10 months.
I remember that feeling I felt when the wheels of the airplane touched the ground one last time.
I remember the feeling of seeing Sweden slowly fade away in my airplane window.
I remember walking around in London with all the yellow STS people.
I remember taking my last footstep in Europe for 10 months.
I remember the feeling of happiness and matureness.
I remember taking my first breathe in Arkansas.
I remember how humid and hot it was.
 
I remember the fear of landing on the biggest airport in the world.
I remember the fear of not making it to my next flight.
I remember being completely lost and not understanding anything.
I remember the feeling of not knowing what was laying ahead of me.
I remember the feeling of being completely alone.
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There is so much to remember from my year in Greenwood, Arkansas.
There is so much to look back on, so much to love and be thankful for.
There is so much love and joy in one single town.
There is so many people who ones were names on sheets of paper that
now means everything to me.
There is so many words to help describe my year in Greenwood, but 
there isn't enough words to describe this amazing opportunity and experience I had.
I want to thank everyone who made my year so special, it was truly the best year of my life.
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Sunday June 7th, I took my last footstep in Greenwood, Arkansas.
Monday June 8th, I finally set my feet down on Swedish grounds again and
I can tell everyone of you, that it is the weirdest thing I have ever experienced.
As I said earlier, I do not know how to act, how to speak, or how to live.
I feel completely lost, lonely and insecure. I do not know how my friends live
their lifes now, I do not know who my friends hangout with.
I feel like I moved into a completely new town again, yet still everything is the same.
 
I walk those familiar roads.
Even though it has been a year, it feels like I never left.
Nothing abstract is different back here, nothing.
I fight my hardest to hold on to my american life, but it is so hard.
Everyone of you are enjoying summer over there.
You are going to festivals, you are hanging out with your friends,
you are having the time of your life, and I am stuck here, in Sweden.
I left my best friends, to return to your best friends.
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I do not know what I did last year?
Because the things I did do not seem to matter, or be as important to me now.
"The things I hold highest now, no one here understands"
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"I'm trying desperatly to hold on to every memory I have,
while trying to understand what I left behind."
 
I took down my pictures, I packed my bags, and I said my goodbye's.
There will be no more asking for rides to hangout with my friends,
there will be no more spontanious trips to the mall.
I will not speak my second language everyday. 
I will save and hold every memory close to my heart until that one day,
when I return to that world again.
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I guess I just want to thank everybody, whoever is reading this, Swedish or American.
I want to thank you for being a part of what grew to be the best year of my life.
Thank you to Mona, my hostfamily, Greenwood High, my soccer team,
my friends, coach Post & Staton, thank you.
It was really fun spending my year in Greenwood, Arkansas.
I cannot  wait until the day I come back.
Thank you for everything Greenwood,
it's been fun and it's been real.
 
Love, Mimmi
 
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"How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard?"
"This is not a goodbye, it is a see you later"
 
Somehow I will find a way to adjust between the two worlds I now live in.